June Blues and the annual first week of July life crisis initiated by my birthday

June has been looooongggg- and to end it we are in the midst of a heatwave here in Alberta. I work all the time (like literally, I only have two planned full days off for the month of July and am currently juggling three jobs), causing me to be worried about missing out on summer. One of them is at the Keg Steakhouse and Bar where I worked in high school and again for the past year, the second is at The Little Ice Cream and Soda Shoppe, a locally owned little pink ice cream shoppe on the top of a hill with cool retro decor and random knick-knacks, where our boss makes the ice cream in the basement earning him the nickname the "Troll." I've worked there every summer since I was fifteen. The third job is a food truck called Queen Bees Frites and Sweets serving gourmet fries, french macarons, and desserts, owned by two astrology-obsessed twin sisters. 

In this digital age, it's really easy for me to compare my current reality to my friends, or just other unrealistic situations where influencers and rich teens are able to just fly to Italy, live on a yacht for a week, and drink champagne every day. 

I am also enduring a streak of bad luck where I didn't get accepted into the program I applied for (regardless of my 4.0 GPA) and I did not (yet) receive an offer to live in residence at my school next year. And to top it all off- I'm turning twenty this week. Each birthday I have a life crisis no matter how many fun activities, balloons, and cakes I can organize to distract myself. Especially this year as I'm leaving my teens- it seems even more daunting and stressful to end this decade of my life. 

To the University of British Columbia if you're reading this- give me an offer for a studio in residence as a birthday present I'm begging you <3

On the bright side, I am now fully vaccinated along with my entire family and most of my close friends. Thank GOD for modern medicine! I also received a scholarship at the start of the summer, that although small in the grand scheme of university expenses, is better than nothing. I am learning to be okay with working because I am lucky to be employed and I really don't mind my jobs, especially since I work with good friends at each one. I suppose I was due for a bad luck streak anyways, the people in life who get everything easy are the least cool and intelligent people, just saying. 

The goal this July is: take more days off, explore more of my beautiful province, and no saying no to social outing invites. My pandemic self did NOT survive that to turn down a friend hangout because I'm too tired. I can still take time for myself to get caught up and rest, but I already spent a year of doing just that, all the time. The now is for partying!!! 

I wrote down a list of some mountain day trips and things I want to do this summer to look forward to, and since I am SUCH a list person, I'm going to share them in this blog post. My blog has turned into more of a digital diary that I update every now and again- but I'm going to try to get some more fun, informative posts up about travelling or fashion or something other than me explaining where my headspace is at. These are more like mental check in's for me, aka free therapy!! And as always, my goal is that you can relate to some of the things I'm feeling. I hope you are all having a lovely summer so far or if that is too much just a lovely July 5th. Let's take it day by day as the world reopens up, shall we?